Do you ever get suspicious that your kettle is actually just pretending to boil the water?

You can listen to it of course, however the probability of 3rd degree ear burns increases 400% with every 5cm decrease in ear/kettle proximity.

But you need to know if the kettle is lying! What can you do?

Faced with this dilemma one day, top kettle researcher Janice Inverkeithing found herself strolling through an animal testing laboratory in Edinburgh University, when all of a sudden she noticed that the top scientists were making cups of tea with water boiled in Florence flasks (as it allowed them to inspect the water for monkey hair prior to consumption).

Inspired, she tried following their method, and died soon after from poisoning following experiments with clear plastic and a bunsen burner.

Luckily for suspicious kettle owners everywhere, her work continued after her death thanks to clever reanimation technology and she eventually invented the glass kettle in 1923.

There is only one way to be sure your kettle is boiling, and that’s a thermometer. But if you want to check it’s actually making an effort, a glass kettle is the kettle for you.

A Florence flask

A Florence flask, early predecessor of the glass kettle.